Jacob sat on the park bench listening to the beauty of Gods creation, humming a few tunes along with the birds. His expression was one of serenity and patience as he awaited his longed-for meeting with Clara. To see her face and hear her voice made Jacob more calm and peaceful as ever. He felt content just knowing he would see Clara let alone speak with her.
As bikers and joggers passed by, so did the time. Jacob checked his watch noticing it had passed half an hour and he began to lose his peace. Leaving his bench, which kept him sane, he began to pace. Back and forth, back and forth. He checked his watch--35 minutes.
"Jacob!", he heard and he turned toward the direction of the voice. There she was; skin aglow, hair in natural brunette beauty, face in radiance. She was wearing a sundress that fit her form but an expression that didn't fit his joy.
Seeing this Jacob realized her reason for meeting him here. Her body language said it all. "Oh, but she does look gorgeous.", Jacob thought aloud. By the time he said this he was already face to face with Clara, so she heard him but ignored it.
"Hi Jacob.", she said, eyes avoiding his.
"Clara.", he replied. "I'm glad to see you're better. You look great.", he smiled that dimpled smile.
Once again pushing aside his compliment, Clara said, "We need to talk." Jacob only nodded and Clara continued, "Let's sit. Okay where do I begin?", her nervousness was apparent in the shaking of her hands, but Jacob only listened.
"Jacob I wanted to tell you that I have forgiven you. I have pushed aside the past and I'm focusing on the now." Clara paused to see his reaction, but he was still listening. " I'm finding myself; something I haven't been able to do for five years because I still held on to the pain and words you inflicted on me. I can't, I won't let someone like you hold me back ever again. And honestly the person holding me back the most was me. That accident was God-willed, you rescuing me was God-willed. God had this happen so that I could finally surrender to him and leave my burdens at his doorstep. I wanted to thank you."
Jacob's handsome face that earlier filled with content morphed into one of sadness. "I guess you're welcome.", was all he said and his eyes were downcast and the dimples disappeared.
Clara held his hand, lifted his head and said, "I'm sorry if this wasn't what you were expecting, but I needed to do this for me."
"And what about me?", Jacob asked. Clara was taken aback.
"You wanna know what happened when I got to rehab?", Jacobs voice now sullen. "I get there, go through the program, and relapse. Then I drank and drank and drank. A cop found me scarred and naked in the street in the middle of the night. So my sentence? Rehab. I go through the program for the second time and I relapse. Third, fourth, fifth. And then I realize by my fifth time trying to get sober and normal again, that I was only drinking because I was away from you. I was drinking because I had no where to go. My family disowned me, you kicked me out. I'm 25 years old and my own mother is afraid to see me. So I prayed, I asked for God's mercy and one more chance at life, I sobered up--a year and a half now, and I came back to start over. I can't do this alone. I need you, Clara."
Clara pondered this. "So you blame me?" Her eyes grew big and her eyebrows furrowed.
"No, I don't."
"But that's what you said. You said that I'm the reason you were drinking. You know, you never take responsibility for your actions! You're always the victim! You hit me, you left your family, and you drank! Don't you dare blame me for your mistakes!"
Clara jumped up from the bench and stalked away from Jacob, leaving him where he began. His merry mood that overtook him before was long gone in some abyss far far away. Her words were true and they stung, but Jacob simply shrugged the thought away and replaced it with his former thought--"The fault was not mine. She should be apologizing." He walked out of the park and came upon a liquor store.
"I don't need this." Jacob said as he set the 6-pack on the counter.
Clara pondered this. "So you blame me?" Her eyes grew big and her eyebrows furrowed.
"No, I don't."
"But that's what you said. You said that I'm the reason you were drinking. You know, you never take responsibility for your actions! You're always the victim! You hit me, you left your family, and you drank! Don't you dare blame me for your mistakes!"
Clara jumped up from the bench and stalked away from Jacob, leaving him where he began. His merry mood that overtook him before was long gone in some abyss far far away. Her words were true and they stung, but Jacob simply shrugged the thought away and replaced it with his former thought--"The fault was not mine. She should be apologizing." He walked out of the park and came upon a liquor store.
"I don't need this." Jacob said as he set the 6-pack on the counter.
